Counseling with spouse or partner.

Substance abuse counseling alongside your spouse or romantic partner can be highly productive, if you feel that you are up for it. During active addiction, a romantic partner is often somebody that is to be avoided and given as little information as possible. In recovery, we learn to be more honest about our daily life struggles...and to our surprise, our partners do not usually run away. In fact, they seem less cold towards us, as if a bit of a thaw is taking place. Progress.

Our romantic partners can be a valuable asset to our recovery. Here's a few of the top reasons.

Before we get sober, or are still very new to sobriety, we don't see the substance use problem quite as factually as our partner. We tend to minimize...partners do not...and the facts are the truth that we need.

Wanting to keep a romantic relationship is a powerful motivator for many people in recovery. Motivation is THE key in recovery, so we'll take it from any and all sources possible.

They can become a great "accountability partner". They probably won't lead you into temptation. They might actually have your back if you go into a situation where alcohol is present. A client once told me "there was zero chance of me drinking at that party because my girlfriend had already texted my drinking buddies and set them straight about what would happen to them if they helped me drink." I also once had a client tell me "every week that I don't drink, my wife rewards me, with uh, well, you know (laughs)".

They can be a good companion for some of the hours that become available when we get sober and stop spending time with people that abuse substances.

Some partners turn out to be good at offering verbal encouragement - and sometimes a kind or positive comment is a breath of fresh air right into your soul.